the first decision in our homeschool quest

The Principal of our neighborhood elementary school returned my call last evening. Knowing the sheer pace and end-of-the-year frackas that befalls all teaching institutions this time of year, I did not expect a returned call this month, much less within 24 hours of my message. I was elated, but suddenly I was heart-in-the-throat not ready to have this conversation. But I did anyway. You see, a bit over a year ago, Copper and I sat down to a pow wow. We prayed, talked in depth about our mutual and individual educational and spiritual goals, fears, and hopes for LaLa, and committed to leave ourselves open to God's direction when it comes to the schooling of our children. We have been in active pursuit of discovering exactly what that plan might be ever since.

We've chosen to enroll LaLa in our church and the neighborhood public school kindergarten simultaneously while we educate ourselves on homeschooling options, simply so that we might be poised make our final choice only after we felt completely confident and at peace with it. Basically, we've left our options open and have been praying like fiends. Over the last few months, we have come to conclude that 32.5 hours a week of kindergarten in ANY school is more than a little ridiculous and contraindicated for our child (and for me, the more outspoken of our union, generally - the phrase I actually used was a bit stronger. I believe, "...ridiculous for ANY 5-year old human being. I had part time jobs in college with less hours!" was uttered). We chose to confront the public school option by asking the Principal if the school could accommodate our desire to send our child to kindergarten 3 days a week, rather than 5. Or, if five days was set in stone - we do not want her in school for more than four hours per day. These were the conditions under which we were willing to consider sending our child to public school. And even if then, we have ample critical reservations about public school.

Our thoughts behind contacting the Principal this week were simply that if he did not support this general plan of ours or the school had limited flexibility to accommodate our needs, that would be our best indication against pursuing a public school education for our child.

God bless this man, he spoke openly and answered honestly. He counseled me that, given the advanced state of LaLa's education at this point (she tested at second grade, 7th month level in reading and 3rd grade, 2nd month level in math at the kindergarten entrance testing last month, for whatever those results are worth), and the fact that we are concerned about so many defining aspects of a public education, and that our child is almost painfully sensitive and struggles with being able to function well in overstimulated situations, homeschooling for kindergarten is our best option in his estimation. And his next statement I will long remember and am particularly grateful to have been told, "I have been a public educator for over 27 years and I have learned that there is no right way to educate all children. If I were the parent to the child you just described, I would not hesitate for a moment to homeschool her in kindergarten. If you decide to integrate her in first grade, we will work with you on creating an I.E.P. program where she has a reduced day, and is mostly home-study based." WOW! I didn't know such a thing existed, but it was such a great feeling to be supported by another (you guys included) objective, educated, knowledgeable person.

He reminded me several times that he was speaking off the record (I did not know there was a record. Should I be keeping a record? I guess I need to start keeping a record...), but that "avid advanced learning" is not what kindergarten is about in a public school setting. Basic letter/color/art/word recognition skills, socialization, and learning to follow directions and conquer self control seemed to be the themes. All of which are worthy goals. All of which we long surpassed in this house. Even our 2-year old knows his colors, can count to ten, recite his A-B-C's, does age-appropriate art, and plays well with his peers. My sentiment that 32.5 hours in a kindergarten class (public or private) would be a waste for LaLa fairly well solidified and hit the bottom of my stomach with a defining "clunk".

While the apparently advanced state of my kids' educational status at the moment is not the sole determinant on how we choose to pursue their education, my conversation with this lovely, humble, honest, funny man was SO helpful in realizing that my instincts, my heart, my prayers have led me on the right path all along.

We are not going to send our daughter to public school kindergarten.

A DECISION AT LAST!

So, that leaves either private school, which we have previously discounted entirely because it involves a more expensive, uniformed version of the same struggles we wrestle with in considering public school.

Or, homeschooling.

I have called on four friends today who are currently homeschooling, seeking information and thoughts. At their counsel, I have ordered two books online, borrowed several others, and am awaiting a compilation of all kinds of good stuff to be delivered from the homeschooling archives of one of my closest friends. I am researching curriculum. I spent over 2 hours today on starfall.com and other favorite sites with LaLa and building the base of a project she is engineering with wood outside (meant to be a base for an owl roost - we'll see what morphs since our area is notably bereft of owls). I pretended we had already chosen to homeschool and I was flooded with a sense of PEACE and JOY and RELIEF. I felt calm. I felt right.

I have a feeling this decision is already made and just waiting for our mouths to utter what our minds and hearts already know.

I am so grateful for the prayers of those who love me and those here on this board who I have never met but am blessed by already. I can't believe the quickness and completeness of the answers God will send when we ASK HIM WITH A PURE HEART. For the first time in fourteen months of wrestling with this topic, I am going to sleep with a sense of abiding hope.