kindergarten, fox news style

Tuesday morning at 8:25 (well, as it's us, 8:27) a.m. will find us, well the 5-year old one of us, returning to kindergarten.

Though we experienced both a brilliant and disheartening start to kindergarten, we've committed to give it the old college try and at least weather the full month of September before making any rash decisions about the future of the Family Lachen and Public School Kindergarten. Miss Sauce simultaneously manages to both love and hate it, which harmonizes very well with my own sentiments. We are simply not sure if it is the ideal or appropriate place for our strong~willed, sweet, gifted, vastly intelligent, almost painfully sensitive, ADHD child. The two time-outs she received in class on her second day of instruction (which were appropriate to her behavior and supported by both Copper and I), and the resulting ongoing emotional obsession and anxiety over the last two days about being in trouble at school are leading us to wonder. Again. And again.

More bulletins can be expected here in blogger land as events warrant here in Decision 2006: Kindergartengate. Maybe I should start a rolling scroll at the bottom of my blog page like the news channels do. Here's a little preview of what that might look like on any given day, if the first two are a solid example (you have to imagine this information whirring by you in a blue band at the bottom of your screen, tantalizingly slow...):

8:27 a.m. ~ Miss Sauce arrives for another day of kindergarten *** 10:19 ~ Miss Sauce is still in kindergarten. Reading group, to be precise. The behavioral Treaty of Temperament is still being upheld. *** 11:44 p.m. ~ Miss Sauce is still in kindergarten, but received a dreaded Time~Out. The UN may get involved in peacekeeping efforts. France is considering sending 3 1/2 troops. *** 12:00 ~ Lunchtime. Too many carbs and not enough water may cause restlessness and overexuberance. Warning! This may lead to yet another Time Out. *** 12:48 p.m. ~ Second Time~Out received. The classroom is now on ORANGE ALERT ~ the second highest alert level. Expect Mrs. Thompson to address the nation of Lachen shortly.


Yeah, maybe not.