office ode

"I am faster than 80% of all snakes" ~ Dwight Schrute

Sweet Ending to the Sweetie Saga...

Sweetie the hamster escapee has been found!

Alive and well, and apparently seeking shelter in the ample shade of our refrigerator. When she popped out at me in the early morning as I was gathering breakfast supplies, she can count herself lucky not to have been screamed at or accidentally maimed with an accidentally dropped egg carton.

Drafting both of my children into the hamster wrangling team, we manged to capture her and reunite her with the finite interior edges of her cage. My children are elated and repeatedly retold the story of their triumphant capture to their friends over the last week. It's soon to be the thing of family legend. At least in 3-and 6-year old imaginations.

... we now return you to your regularly scheduled programming ...

What if...

What if there is a God? ONE God, not many. Not the cosmos, not the "spirit of oneness", not the awareness ofn amorphic, noncommittal "higher power, but the ONE GOD: The Alpha and the Omega - Almighty God. The creator of the heaven and the earth. The LORD.

What if Jesus is the Way, the Truth and the Life?

What if Jesus is the only way, like He said He is? Our ONLY way to eternity - to heaven - what if He is telling the truth?

What if we CANNOT be fully whole without accepting His gift? What if our life ends here without Him?

What if we cannot ever know, embody, express, understand, or share the fullness of love or life without Him?

What if we are living our life under a veil that can only be lifted by the grace and love of Jesus? What if we can't see through it until we turn on the light that can only be found through Jesus?

What if it is as easy as a prayer. A hope. Our arms reaching toward heaven in faith that Jesus will take our hands and lead us to Him?

What do we have to lose by embracing the mere possibility of these "WHAT-IF's"? What do we have to lose if we don't embrace Christ and these "what-if's" are real? Only our soul, our eternity, the purpose of our life here on earth.

What if today is the last day we have to contemplate the what-if's in our life?

WHAT IF?

Seeking "Sweetie"

Our family has adopted a handful of dwarf hamsters. And voila! We have pets. The idea was to introduce our children to pet ownership in a manageable, responsible, fun, and meaningful way - with animals small enough not to be too daunting and to allow interaction with our kids in a tangible way (we have tropical fish, but unless you have serious mental issues or your fish are somehow in the midst of some loopy Darwinian evolutionary process, you can't really PET fish).

We initially adopted one for each member of our family: Scamper (my son's), Selena (my daughters'), Salty (mine - quite appropriately named), and Sushi (my husband's). 4 little teeny hamsters. And they are ADORABLE and endearing: they crawl all over you and nestle in your neck, making tiny sounds that resemble lightly clicking bunny rabbits, and tickling you with their curious whiskers.

Unfortunately, our hamster journey has not been without its pitfalls. We've had these little critters now for a little under a month. After the first 10 days, we had to return the little white hamster that was my daughter's (Selena) to the pet store because it was an incessant biter and a fairly Selena was replaced by "Sweetie". Sadly, my daughter's replacement hamster (named "Sweetie" ) came up missing this morning, evidently the victim of my children leaving the cage open for a few minutes yesterday while I was out of the room taking out the trash. There are so many lessons to be learned there, among them:

a.) do not leave children alone for even one second with LIVE creatures

b.) taking out the trash is not always a good thing

c.) the fact it is cute and furry does not lessen the somwhat creeped out feeling of knowing it is loose in your house and may turn up at any moment - ideally not as you sit down on it

So, today found our family on a full scale hamster hunt in our house, seeking this minute little furball that is squatting somewhere in our house, even as I type. We have yet to locate any sign of Sweetie the Hamster. My daughter, ever the brilliant innovator, put up "missing" signs in our kitchen, on our front door, and in the living room. With a reward offered of $42.00. She is so tenacious and smart, this little one.

And it's not a bad idea, assuming that hamsters can read.

But if you can locate our miniature missing rodent, that $42.00 is yours. Any takers?

blue hue boo boo

I painted my toenails blue last night.

If you've never had the experience of having azure blue toenails before, I must say it is over-rated.

I did not realize how much effort would be involved in actually getting blue nail laquer OFF of freshly painted toenails. After spending 10 minutes trying to un-blue the big toe on my left foot, I relented, repainted, and will have to wait out this "blue period". There is not enough acetone in the world to tackle this stuff, and I am not brave enough to bring out a blowtorch, which is about the level of power I think I'd need. I'll have to patiently wait for time to take its welcome toll and chip this edgey sapphire paint from my little piggies.

Whomever conceived of the whole blue toenail phenomenon concept must see merits I am decidedly missing.

In the meantime, I am rediscovering the beauty and utility of socks.

A Heart-Filled Holiday

So.

I've been on holiday for a bit.

...One of those holidays that was not so much a holiday as a time out. But it has been a necessary evil: a break from all things blogging, though I have missed both this exercise (and the benefits and soul stretching that accompany it) but also the people I've managed to bump into and intersect lives with because of the blogosphere.

I was delighted to see that some of you actually checked in here, looking for me or searching and lamenting in my general direction, whilst I was absent. Your posts and presence caused my heart yearn to come back and be a part of this sphere once more.

So, off we go: Lachen is back. And content as a clam about it.

*** note to Brandon: please resist the temptation to launch into a silent existential dilemma in your mind right now about whether or not clams - or any shellfish - are actually content. It's just a phrase. Deal. ***

If you'll forgive the sophomoric outline format, I offer a 10-point update on the notable happenings in the life and ponderings of Lachen since I last left you in rainy February:



1.) It's amazing to me how quickly time can pass.

2.) I have learned to slow down, almost as a reaction to my first observation, to actively savor the moments of my life as they happen, not in retrospect.

3.) Year one of kindergarten is behind us at Casa Lachen. And my daughter has been an incredibly strong and resilient human being through this year. I daresay she weathered it far better than her Mama, who is still struggling with the realization that her baby child is going to be entering first grade in a little less than a month. I never believed myself capable of the degree of sappy emotional longings as I have encountered in myself over the course of the last 12 months as school becomes a constant in our lives. I have also begun to rebel against it, like a caged bird will often bite those who come near enough to his beak. It's my own little passive-aggressive way of battling the forces of this world, however worthy and beneficial they may be, that seek to separate my child from me before I'm ready. I doubt I'll EVER be fully ready for my children to grow up, even as I delight in their discoveries and triumphs, nurse their wounds, and hold their hands through struggles they encounter along the way.

4.) We are now officially DIAPER FREE! After a rather frustrating combination of amusement and exasperation, sprinkled with prayerful resignation, LITTLE MAN (our son has been renamed in the blogosphere!) has taken it upon himself to learn to use the potty with consistency. We are celebrating Day 48 of this phenomenon and are taking both kids to Disneyland at the end of the summer to officially mark the momentous occasion.

5.) I had two heart surgeries.

I know.

Both procedures were unexpected and not related to heart disease, cholesterol, or any of the usual suspects that permeate when it comes to the stereotypical scenarios that pepper the brain when it comes to the words "heart surgery". They were, in fact, two failed attempts to close a congenital hole that was discovered between my ventricles, causing two strokes in the last year. Oh, yes, I forgot about that part: I had 2 strokes, too. Both not catastrophic and both relatively recoverable, although I bear scars (which I find personally humorous, not daunting, so all is well). I have bounced back from all of this remarkably and with the miraculous spirit of the LORD JESUS CHRIST at the helm of the healing process. And - the big one - even though my incredibly capable and caring doctors were unable to close this hole with all the medical might and mastery they could throw at it over the course of 2 separate surgical interventions, GOD stepped in. By 6 weeks post-op (the second time around), my body had somehow managed to grow scar tissue in an unpredictable manner, which ended up sealing the hole on one side!

To state that this is a miracle is a gross understatement of the TRUTH. This is a BIG, FAT MIRACLE. According to my cardiologists, this type of spontaneous closure has never happened before in the documented medical history of this particular type of hole. The doctor-types in charge of my care were utterly and delightfully astounded.

We are rejoicing. Copper was extremely anxious throughout this ordeal, as it is often harder to be the one in the benign state of observation rather than the active state of participation, when events like this unfold. It was hard on him, and he is thrilled to be on the other side of these last few months.

I, on the other hand, have been cloaked in a transforming sense of contentment, peace, and joy from start to finish. Though this was a scary, I just did not have a spirit of fear or of being daunted and overwhelmed. None of that occurred to me, actually. I just felt completely assured and filled with PEACE. If that sounds like a trite, uncompelling sentiment that is often heard from Christians, I do apologize for my lack of creativity. But I assure you that when faith is placed in God, and we TRULY let go, He will be our strength and will direct our paths.I have learned to live the verse that promises us that "When we are weak, He is strong".

Amen to that.


And the bonus in all of this is that, from now on, all my moments of unfortunate clumsiness, spelling errors, or general brain malaise will have a built-in scapegoat. :) That's always fun.



6.) I was in line at midnight on July 21 to pick up the 7th and last installment of the Harry Potter series. And within 6 hours, had utterly devoured it and was pretty satisfied. With the novel and with myself for powering through it nonstop. I've now manged to read it again twice since then, and it gets richer for me with every read. I am an unabashed fan of the whole Harry Potter shabang. Though my mother is convinced that the books are from the devil, and my husband chuckled at me as I left to purchase my 752 pages of literary candy in a yellow dust jacket with the face of a child on Christmas morning, I am triumphant. I enjoy the books, the movies, and the field trips of imagery my mind embarks on as I read. I ponder, wonder, appreciate, think, imagine, and create within myself as I embrace JK Rowling's painstakingly created wizard world. I admit to my own sense of delight as I approached our local bookstore at 11:30 pm and saw hoardes of people - young and old alike - gathered in raptured anticipation. Not to glimpse a movie star or attend a rock concert, but to buy a BOOK. And READ... and read, and read.


It made my heart smile. Which is a good thing.

7.) I am still drinking Dr. Pepper regularly.

I don't even know if this was a necessary update, as it is a constant in the world of Lachen. My children, God bless them, even gave me a Dr. Pepper T-shirt for Mother's Day, which delighted me. Some Moms just get flowers.

8.) Jesus rocks.

Another unnecessary update. Just gives me an opportunity to shout it out again.

9.) I am semi-seriously thinking about starting a 3rd legitimate political party, to fit somewhere in the middle between the two choices that dominate America at the moment. I find myself an alien in my own country when it comes to the political and social currents running in either direction.

10.) I took the break from the blog, in part, to give myself some much craved REST.

I am a sprinter at heart. Though I lament to admit it. I have always been better at running unyeildingly fast and hard for short distances than plodding smoothly along at a slower pace that allows for a longer race. I find myself wishing I was more of a long-distance person because I have indelible respect for those who are and whose lives bear the unmistakable signs of that capacity. But as time creates wisdom in my life, I find myself embracing what I am by default and endeavoring to sharpen and change it as I can. I am a sprinter - when I have reached the end of a particularly difficult leg in life, I need to stop, rest, and find the still place of quiet before I begin again. Resting like this nourishes me and it integral to my life. It's one of the reasons that there is never a time in my life that I do not have a vacation planned - even if it is a year in advance. It gives me a goal, a destination, something to sprint towards.

Because I know that at the end of my race, there will be a time when I can rest.

The months prior to my blog break had demanded of me so heavily that I needed to carve out a place of rest for myself before merging back onto life's freeway, refueled and ready to roll.