grouch buster

Am I the only one who has noticed the stark absence of JOY from the everyday faces around us lately?

You haven't noticed? Really?

There's ample evidence of this grouchy trend: the waiters at various restaurants, the checker at the supermarket, the lawn man, the lady who walks her dog past your house at 6:18 every evening, the news anchors, drivers and passengers of cars around you, the kid who throws your neighbor's newspaper onto your wet lawn every morning. Lotsa people looking like they are under lotsa stress. There is just a hardness and an edge to the expressions of our fellow humans, isn't there?

Conduct this basic, simple experiment today. I promise, you'll notice this trend. Just take a look around while you are driving. Doing errands, dropping the kids ar school, driving to the church, beach, store, infernal post office ~ whatever. Now, don't do it so obviously that you will either a.) get into an accident or b.) risk being on the receiving end of an obscene gesture (or worse!) for overtly staring at someone next to you in a dark Cadillac who may or may not be a member of the mob.

Just gently and discreetly check out the mugs of your fellow drivers on the road. They may be chatting on their cell phones, trying to tame unruly children, or smoking (!), but they are all tending to look pretty darned grim these days.

OK, there are lots of potential reasons for the grouchy faces I've been noticing around me. High gas prices. Maybe that's it. We're at war. That's could be the reason for the grouchy/pained/wan expression epidemic I've been noticing. Possibly. But you know what? Even before airplanes slammed into buildings and then more airplanes delivered bombs over remote mountain caves, even before gas began to cost $17.00 a gallon ~ people were walking around with unhappiness etched deeply into their faces like scars from battle. It is as if a pall of sadness descended on people lately - and I continue to note it around me. And it seems to be worsening.

As for me, I am ebullient by nature. Put me in a car as the driver, and I am utterly content. Add music and I am downright giddy. I find myself just constantly reminded of God and the fact that I am breathing in and out, and am just thrilled to contemplate that miracle most days. Yes, I have troubles, too. No, my life is not perfect. But perfection is not required to experience or share joy, is it? So I tend to CHOOSE joy, choose to find grace and purpose and fun and silliness and hope in the everyday life I lead here in my everyday corner of the everyday world. Even though I am burdened, even when I am bothered, even when...

My response to the current epidemic of palpable grouch has been to smile widely at those people around me. It's my personal effort to spread a little sunshine around and let others know that someone, in that moment, cares about them enough to try to penetrate the cloud cover over their spirit. It's not always effective. Sometimes it is distinctly ineffective. I have had people offer me various fingers or other fascinating gestures in response to my smiles of joy. I have had people frown at me or roll up their car windows or lock their doors in response to me. I have had people look the other way, ignore me, or actually look scared (to their credit, I guess an intently smiley woman can weird you out after awhile), or look at me through their windows as though I was from Venus. No guys, I am not an alien. It's called a smile. Alien. Smile. Very, very different entities.

Never mind.

So today, I venture out onto the streets with another hopeful plan. A plan to influence those around me towards a more joyful place by inducing them to laugh... at me. It is a generally well known thought by those who spend any degree of time with me that music moves me to sing along. Alright, a caveat: GOOD music that I relate to an actually appreciate causes me to sing along. Today, it was the CARS soundtrack Copper bought on Friday for the kids, and especially Dash, who has been utterly taken with Lightening McQueen since we first locked eyes on that movie (it's coming out on DVD November 7th! See? more evidence of the rather useless trivia I have banging around inside my cranium at any given time). The tune "Life Is A Highway" is a delight, an played repeatedly in my car this afternoon (Dash requested it, and I was all too happy to oblige!) Singing it at top volume while also be-bopping my head around and playing air drums on my steering wheel must make me look like quite ridiculous from the average bystander's perspective. Or it could look alarming, as though I have a seizure disorder that also involves singing loudly.

But in any case, my jubilant all-body contact singing seemed to have an unexpected side effect today. It caused spontaneous grins to burst to the surface all around me. Which then fueled my joy even more, and increased my vocals and instrumentals, thereby perpetuating more pleasant (or bewildered, but bewilderment that wore a SMILE) responses around me.

So I venture out with a renewed desire to sing in the car: it delights me and seems to bring joy to the surface for others around me. At least I am doing my part to cure this epidemic of GROUCH before it infects me first.

It is a pre-emptive strike. Well, my own version of it anyway.